An Epiphany on Emotions

I get it. After a stressful, emotional week, I get it!

We have been groomed in our society to express our emotions, to embrace and act on them. We are constantly bombarded with images that play on our emotional responses. From commercials for chocolate promising a moment of pleasure to TV shows glorifying outrageous, shocking behavior to keep us invested in their emotional roller coaster dramas. We are a society run by emotions! Not that I'm saying all emotions are bad, just that we shouldn't let our emotions control us! Even love can be expressed in a way that hinders a person, i.e. spoiled children turn into spoiled adults. If we put our emotions first, no matter the situation, I'm not sure how helpful we would be to others.

 

My revelation for the week: Emotion is another word for self
 

Emotion is how we responded to situations. How we feel it affects us.

Google defines emotion as: "a natural instinctive state of mind deriving from one's circumstances, mood, or relationships with others" 

Though the Bible doesn't use the word "emotion" (in the translations I've seen) there are countless verses imploring us to control ourselves (James 3) and yield to the Holy Spirit. 

When Christ freed us from sin He broke all of our bonds. We are no longer slaves to thoughts and feelings. In fact, we have been called to rise above them in all situations.(Philippians 4)

This may be nothing profound to anyone else, but it left me speechless to realize that most of our sins stem from emotions; Anger, envy, gluttony = emotions.  mind = blown!

So what does this revelation mean for me? change! . . . I hope ;)


As a wife, I am praying to honor my husband more. . . even when I don't feel like it. . . even when I think he's wrong. . . even when we face consequences to a bad decision he's made. I want to be solid, unshakable, able to be a comfort to him when he needs it, and strong enough to share any burden he's carrying. I can't be a pillar for him if my responses change with my moods. I'm not saying we won't disagree, but I don't want to respond out of my emotions to defeat him when conflict does arise. I want him to feel safe and secure with me.

As a mother, I am praying to not react out of emotion when my kids screw up -And- not to take it out on them when I get overwhelmed and angry. I want to love them selflessly. I want to be able to help them when they need me, not condemn them for doing something wrong. . . we can correct without condemning!

Finally, as a child of God, I am praying to be fully surrendered to the Holy Spirit through Christ. I want to focus on His love for me and others and I want to walk in that love, even when people purposely anger or hurt me. We are told that we wrestle with spirits, not with flesh and blood(people) Ephesians 6:11-13 so why are we so impatient and unwilling to pray for those who buffet us? I have come to the conclusion that only through prayer and studying God's word can we even begin to understand what Christ has done for us. Through the Holy Spirit, He has given us the power to resist acting out through our emotions. To be sober minded and see truth instead of spending our lives justifying our bad behaviors. To see who we really are at the heart level, the good and the bad. When we get THAT revelation, when we see how undeserving we were of His love yet how fervently He pursued us, how He still cleanses us and draws us to Himself, THEN can we start to get over our emotional hang ups and pet peeves to reach out to someone else, just as undeserving, yet just as loved. Because we get it, finally!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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An Introvert's Plea

A couple of months ago, my husband and I left our church. As with any change in life it was a bit difficult and sad. However, I really had a peace about it and felt God was calling us toward something else. So we began visiting different churches as we tried to find God's will for us in this area.

As you may have assumed from the title, my husband and I are both introverts. Since I feel most of us that "suffer" from introvertism  (pretty sure that's a word) are completely misunderstood, I will take a moment here and lay out some of the qualities and handicaps of being an introvert.

Energized by time alone

Private

Keeps to self

Quiet

Deliberate

Internally aware

Fewer friends

Prefer smaller groups

Independent

Not socially inclined

Enjoys solitude

Thinks before speaking

I would add (just my opinion) that introverts may even have heightened senses, almost to the point of not being able to function correctly when surrounded by chaos. It may not seem chaotic to others, but most concerts, shows, sports, and even large family gatherings can be overwhelming. Of course, that could just be me.

I know that I crave peace and quiet. I need time to myself and get irritable if I go too long without it.

Now, I do have some close friends that would snicker at the thought of me being an introvert. But they are MY people and I feel comfortable opening up to them. I'm still not good with hugging though.
- Respect the bubble -

HERE is a list of comparison I found interesting .... Anyone else an INFJ??

Having said these things I have a slight criticism - plea - to the church. Sometimes, the way we go all out to seem all inclusive can come across as overbearing and do exactly the opposite of what I know we're trying to do!

I tried to write about this months ago, but never published it. I went back and read it today and you can just feel the frustration I had! Here's a small excerpt:

As I visit our local churches, I am really disappointed. I have been welcome-wagoned to death! I do appreciate the nice mugs, flashlight key-chains, and cool stickers, but the emails, cards, MULTIPLE phones calls and such are just not for me. Neither is the big fuss and applause appreciated. I'm not trying to be rude, but some churches go way overboard with their "join our club" culture. I don't remember the guys in the book of Acts pasting on clown-worthy smiles and blocking the exit until you fill out their "guest" card. Can I just say, ugh...just ugh!

*I'm almost ashamed to post this. I think I was being too critical, but I just wanted to share the feeling, even if it wasn't expressed in the most admonishing way.*

I'm not asking the church to come around to my liking. I'm just hoping to shed some light on an issue I've seen. Introverts are not likely to be comfortable with you grabbing their hand and asking them tons of questions. We are processors! Analyzers! Please give us time to take it all in. If you are preaching the Gospel, let IT be what makes people feel welcome and loved. And when you do approach someone, even extroverts, be sincere. You'd be amazed how obvious it is when we aren't. Let us ALL walk in love and we will point people to Christ, at church and else where, whether we are introverted or extroverted.

Oh, and if you're wondering, we have found a church and have seen God's hand directing us through this change. I now believe even more that we were obedient to His voice when we decided to leave. My heart is full of thankfulness when I think about our journey in Christ so far. I praise Him for His guidance and provision for us. His love truly IS amazing!

 

A Homeschool Mama's Sin

I'm a (wanna be) writer at heart. I work through my problems by praying and writing. This means that I will have a seemingly random post from time to time. 

Warning: This may be one of those posts. 

My hope is that in sharing this is if anyone is struggling with what I am, it will be of some help. . .


This homeschool year has been so "off" for us!

- and it's only our second! -

We've already been dealing with the extreme cut in pay for me to be home, but it's been more than that. It's been stressful. Unorganized. Frustrating!

There are plenty of places I could put blame for my new go to emotion, Panic.

• I could blame my house for being so tiny yet so full.
• I could detest my husband's job for changing his schedule so that he's here while we are learning (try keeping a 9yo boy's attention when his HERO is in the next room! Impossible).
• I could whine about the lack of funds for field trips and got-to-have resources.
• I could also have a bad attitude and LOATHE going to work. . . . I'm still working on that one.

Yet, I know homeschooling is God's will for us. I can't explain it but this IS what I am called to do. It. just. is. 


So, why isn't it working?!


It's about the heart. EVERYTHING with God is about the heart. 


This week, while whining praying my signature "why isn't it working!" prayer in my bathroom as I readied myself (reluctantly) for work, He answered. Gently, yet clearly. . .


Focus.


It seems my focus had shifted from training my son's heart, to thinking, worrying, OBSESSING over what I was teaching and whether it was good enough when I compared it to all the homeschoolers I knew. 


~ Yes. I made it about me. Again. ~


I am thankful for homeschool friends and all the advice and opinions that are so readily available through social media, BUT, we mamas need to remind ourselves that God called US ~ as we are ~ to be mom/teacher of our children. 


Each of our children has a God ordained purpose in life. A calling. Our main concern ~ MY main concern ~ should be submitting ourselves to the Holy Spirit. Not only in homeschooling, but in everything! How else will We prepare them to do the same?!


We truly screw up when we compare ourselves to others. I'm afraid we homeschoolers may even struggle a bit more than others in this area. It's so easy to be impressed by pictures that fill our news feed with happy kids doing awesome, genius, things. 


But, they are just pictures. 


Just a split second glance into that families homeschool life. 


I believe God wants ME to focus on my son's character and heart, so that's what I'm gonna do. Every decision will be placed in His hands, where it belongs. 


My child is not your child. Your child may be meant for scientific genius while mine may be called to be a missionary. Both callings are great. Both can be used to glorify God. The scientist shouldn't look down on the missionary because he doesn't have a Ph D, yet the missionary  shouldn't exalt himself for the sacrifices and works he's given to the ministry. Both can be humble servants of the King. 


We could even continue on this train of thought for our judgment of the method of schooling used by others.  . . . even those choosing to send their kids to * gasp! * public school! Dun dun DUNN!


* I might add that I know this first hand as my oldest is in 7th grade at our local public school. Admittedly, this isn't my ideal plan for his life. However, I know God has a plan for Austin and I trust Him. I have and will continue to pray for him as God leads me, but I will not be fearful for his future simply because I can't have my way. *

So, back to homeschooling:
I will encourage my son to spend quality time with his dad instead of interrupting them and forcing him to complete his math sheet. I will let him compose his own songs on his piano instead of nagging him to stick to his sheet music every time. I will pray that God show me how to prepare this still tender heart for whatever He has planned for it. Above all, I will pray for my focus to stay on Christ, because I know that's God's ultimate will for me. 


Lord, help me to focus on You and always yield to Your Spirit in all I do. Amen.